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Sunday, July 24, 2022

The Veil of Crimson Dust. Part 3.

   The Veil of Crimson Dust: Part 3/4

A Solarpunk Story.

By Dylan “Clockwork” Thomas


Link to Part 2/4


    Wayland’s ideas were hailed as the dumbest thing ever. For a start he first needed volunteers to help push every car into town. If it wasn’t a quiet day for the volunteer fire department, and it wasn’t already mostly downhill, it never would have gotten done. Erik was the first volunteer, and he complained the loudest.

Should’ve taken the whole bag,” he grumbled.

Wayland began working immediately. The electrician he bugged constantly just wound sticking around with him in the garage permanently at that point. Between the two of them, a few more of the builders from the shelter and loads of trial and error, gradually the town began to get peppered in wind turbines. The breakthrough they were looking for happened when a ham radio operator figured out how to strip down toasters and computer fans into makeshift heaters. Then things really started to pick up. Natural gas had stopped flowing months ago, and other than a trickle of methane that a local cattle rancher could produce here and there, heat was becoming everyone’s concern. The few people with larger propane tanks had sat empty for weeks. Gradually the shelter builders began putting heaters anywhere they could think of. People’s houses shifted, soon the average house  had a hastily made wood burning stove snaking out a window, an improvised wind turbine nailed to the roof, and all the beds in the house were quickly shoved between the electric heater and the woodstove with what looked like a homeless shelter surrounding the beds inside the house. If there was anything that anyone could have possibly considered to gain a bit more heat, it was tried.

Erik started worrying about the food situation again as soon as the last of the corn was brought in. It only took the city lawyer five minutes with a calculator and a piece of scrap paper to figure out that they didn’t have enough food to get halfway through winter. He then asked if the math looked any better after half of them froze or starved to death. The accountant said that was the first thing he did to stretch things out. Erik then decided to start getting creative on what was edible and what he could find. The first thing he did was go to the library and figure out everything in nature that had calories and wouldn’t immediately kill someone if they ate it. The worst source of this information turned out to be someone who claimed to be a “new age witch” and claimed pokeweed wasn’t poisonous. After hours of trying to puke but nothing coming out of his stomach, he tried to get Wayland on board with burning her at the stake. Later he found that the best source of information in town was a positively ancient old woman who volunteered with the local library and had actually lived through much of the great depression. She actually loaned him several books on edible plants, fungi, and even one on how to cook roadkill. Shame there were barely any cars on the road. Erik bagan setting off covered in jackets, duffle bags and reusable shopping bags. With his bow over his shoulder he began absolutely hauling back whole pantries of herbs, seeds, berries, nuts, and plenty of squirrel corpses.

Erik quickly started to be called eagle eye. Not just for how dangerous he was getting with his bow, but because he always seemed to find something when he went out, even if the dust and decay seemed to have consumed the world. Wayland grew concerned though, the more food Erik brought in, the thinner he got. Erik had started off the year as a solid mass of muscles and blubber, able to do any job as long as there was a glass of whisky at the end of the day. Now Erik seemed to have one foot in the grave. One day Wayland followed him out while he went scavenging.

“Are you ok?”

Same old same old.”

“Erik?”

“Yea?”

“What were we talking about about the last half hour?”

“... you know, dust clogging up the houses and stuff,” Erik hesitated. “Did you ever figure out how to get a wind turbine to power a vacuum?”

“Last week.”

“What?”

“Talked about that a week ago,” Wayland stated. “I got that working two days ago.”

“... congrats?”

“You know we’ve had this conversation a few times.”

“Yea.”

“Have you been eating at all?”

“...”

“Erik please.”

“I get my rations at the same time as you, what’s the soup of the day?”

“What was it yesterday?”

“... Corn?”

“Erik, you ate it right?” Wayland asked.

“Wayland, don’t worry so much.”

“Thing is, I remember you handing in a tupperware container last night.”

“...”

“And you got the soup in a mason jar that morning.”

“Why do you have to ask these questions,” Erik stated with sunken eyes.

“Why is it every time I see you go out hunting, you walk towards the bunker?”

“...”

“Well?”

“Come on, she's waiting for us.”

Both of them walked to the bunker, there was a footpath traveled only by them between the dust and patches of snow. Wayland had realized that they were probably the only people to visit here. Early on some people stopped by, but it was only ever to beg for supplies or a spot inside. After two months, the dirt path there had begun to become overgrown, with dust covering everything that looked like a path. If it wasn’t for Wayland and Erik knowing the telltale signs of the ruined construction yard, there wasn’t much of a sign that humans had been there at all. Dust had caked the parking lot as they walked up to the bunker door. It took them several minutes before they could get a connection to Arya.

“Hey guys,” Arya said with a little wave.

Arya had sunken eyes and globs of snot and other fluids all over her. Wayland would have said she looked awful but he knew neither of them looked any better.

“You guys look terrible,” Arya said, hacking up mucus.

“Allergies?” Erik asked.

“You’re underground in practically winter,” Wayland pointed out.

“Well we have some kind of algae or mold going on in here.”

“Scrub it off the walls,” Wayland replied.

“Yea we’ve been doing that for a month, it just seems to keep going.”

Erik silently started unpacking everything he had, placing his two containers of soup out, a small pile of foraged nuts, as well as some of the willow tea people in town had started making. People in town were starting to get sick as winter was picking up. Medicine was practically non-existent, nutrition was terrible, and people were packed in their houses like sardines. 

“Is anyone else sick down there?” Wayland asked.

“I mean…” Arya sighed. “A few of us yea, I’m not sure what else to do. The tea seems to make things a bit better.”

“It’s supposed to have aspirin in it,” Erik mumbled. “Are you at least getting better?”

“... Yea yea sure,” Arya said. “You’ve been taking your meds too, right?”

“... Sure.”

“Anyway I was told to ask if you could find anything with vitamin C in it, gummies or anything else really.”

“Try the greens,” Erik stated. “I’ll see if I can find some dried berries.”

“Thanks.”

They caught up for a minute before heading back. It seemed like Erik had twenty things to look for by the end of the conversation. Everyone had something they needed, a book to borrow, food to trade for, herbs to forage. Wayland noticed that they hadn’t gotten anything from the bunker that day. Arya said that the guards were trying to quarantine the bunker a bit, while still letting Erik drop things off somehow. At least when Erik donated to the town they gave things back, even just a pat on the back. 

“Take care Arya,” Erik waved. 

“Take care,” Arya waved back.

They began the walk back for a minute before Wayland broke the silence.

“How long has she been sick?” Wayland asked

“I don’t know, I haven’t been all there lately.” Erik sniffled. 

“I’m sorry, please eat though.”

“Yea, don’t worry today I’ll make sure to get something in my stomach.”

“... thanks.”

After a minute of walking Erik replied, “I’m going to do a bit of foraging and take the long way back.”

“You want some help?”

“Nah, I probably won’t get more than a few handfuls,” Erik said. “Do your thing, figure out how to forge Arya a cure or something. I’ll be back soon.”

“Later.”

That night Wayland tried to research everything he could about medicine and discovered he wasn’t alone. It seemed like half the town was sick and nobody had a cure. The town doctor recommended twenty different medications that nobody had and a good diet, which nobody had seen for a while. Bedrest was also hard to come by, even just keeping warm involved going outside to find firewood. Wayland started to get an idea about fixing the diet situation in the cold of winter. Before heading off to bed early in the early winter night, he tried finding Erik to run some ideas past him and reassure him that Arya would be ok.

“Hey is Erik still up?”

“No he hasn’t made it home tonight.”

“...”

“I figured he was with you?” Erik’s roommate confessed.

“...”

“Do you think he’s ok?”

Within a minute, Wayland burst into his garage and grabbed every light source he could find cobbled together. Most of them were car batteries with headlights strapped to the side, but he lugged them out despite the weight. Then he visited the few remaining people in the volunteer fire department who were still up. Within another minute they had an adhoc search party and began combing the woods. It took them another hour to find Erik. Nearly impossible on a moonless night in the countryside. They were saved by Erik’s annoying habit of listening to his phone while foraging and leaving the headphones out. The blaring of old school rock music revealed a collapsed Erik on the side of the path, sputtering for air. 

“Crap he has the virus,” Erik’s roommate stated. “Why didn’t he tell anyone?”

They dragged him in front of the town’s doctor and did all they could. When the doctor was examining him Wayland finally saw how chipped away Erik was. His coat and jeans were full of rags and newspaper, there was practically no muscle or fat left. The doctor was impressed that he could walk at all, especially when they got his boots off to reveal that several toes had been lost to frostbite a while ago. His arms were scarred with insect bites ranging from mosquitoes to ticks and at least one snake. He had even lost teeth due to scurvy. The doctor gave Wayland fifty fifty odds that he’d recover at all, he promised to use the few meds that he had stored away. 

Wayland promised to help any way he could, then left to his garage to cry till he could sleep. 

The next two weeks Wayland worked himself to the bone collecting firewood, fixing stoves, trading most of the tools he’d scavenged. He gave Erik his rations every other day and did his best to forage for food, never with much luck. If it wasn’t the outpouring of support from people donating bits of food and herbal medicine that would have been it. During those two weeks it seemed like the town had begun to empty. More and more people were falling sick or collapsing from the cold. A few houses burnt to the ground, all from people trying to keep fires going without experience or ad hoc heaters shorting out. All in all, the town’s population must have dropped to a third. Even the town’s doctor died after an angry relative stabbed them, thinking they’d withheld drugs. The dead were heaped outside of town. Wayland found there was always food to trade for if he was willing to drag the dead to the town’s barren cornfield. Burying the bodies proved impossible so they let them be covered by dust and snow, and look the other way if they found bite marks in the corpses.

 After two weeks Erik had managed to get out of bed, though he needed to use a cane at that point. His first reaction was to walk to Arya and make sure she was ok. Wayland nearly strangled him. 

“We need to help, she’s been sick.”

“Get the fuck back in bed Erik.” Wayland raged. “You’re going to die if you try to go outside.”

“I can do it.”

“There’s nothing but dust and sleet out there.”

“I can do it.”

“GET IN BED.”

“MAKE ME.”

Wayland physically picked up Erik and tied him to the bed frame. Erik tried to wiggle out for a minute before giving up. After a minute he decided to talk.

“How long has it been?”

“About three weeks, it’s nearly January,” Wayland stated.

“How’s Arya?”

“Fine,” Wayland lied.

“What happened to my foot?” Erik asked.

“The doctor had to amputate it.”

“Where is he?”

“Dead.”

They sat in silence til the day ended. The next day Wayland went ahead and untied Erik, they both realized he wasn’t going anywhere while he relearned to walk. Wayland started a project trying to turn abandoned cars and rooms into makeshelf greenhouses. It took a massive amount of trial and error, but they at least had some green stuff growing that Erik claimed was edible.

After another few weeks of bumming around town, trying to recover as much as possible on little food, winter started to let up a little. Winter hadn’t truly ended, it was one of those weeks where winter let up just long enough to kill off a few wildflowers that were trying to bloom. That’s when Erik gave his ultimatum. 

“I need to go back to foraging,” Erik stated.

“You’re going to check on Arya aren't you?”

“Yes.” Erik stated.

“Don’t.”

“We need to make sure she’s ok.”

“She’s in a heated shelter and has a food stockpile.” Wayland pointed out.

“We need to make sure she’s ok,” Erik insisted.

“We’re barely surviving ourselves,” Wayland stated. “Most of the town is dead.”

“I’m going to check up on her, or I’m not eating.”

“...”

“Neither of us will last long on dandelion greens and pine nuts,” Erik stated.

“... I’ll come with you.”

It took both of them all day before they made it to the bunker. Erik tried to shoot at a nearby fawn, even with its ribs showing it could have fed both of them for a month. As Erik tried to fire his back spasmed in agony. The arrow went wild into the brush and the fawn darted off. Wayland helped Erik up and both of them wandered to where the fawn had been grazing. They found a few dozen wild crabapples half frozen and sour beyond belief. They ate half of them before collecting a few. By the time the brothers had made it to the bunker entrance, they had a handful of green shoots and old nuts, it wasn’t much, but Erik said it was all edible.

When they reached the bunker, both of them sent messages over the wifi. They waited nearly an hour before getting a response. 

A text bubble popped up on their phones. “Hi glad you’re ok, can’t talk right now, please leave anything you have at the door, I’m sorry can’t talk, love you.”

They responded, “are you ok?”

A moment later a text bubble popped up. “Yea, I was sick for a while thinking it was something you guys brought in. Really sorry I can’t talk, not near a camera.”

Erik asked Wayland, “You think she’s ok?”

“I don’t know,” Wayland replied. “Maybe they don’t have any IT people down there.”

“Maybe,” Erik replied.

They respond back to Arya, “Will leave you some crabapples. Let us know when you get your camera fixed. Will come back to talk soon.”

There was a solid ten minutes with no reply before another message popped up. “Will try to get it working tomorrow, love you both.”

“Bye, love you too,” they replied before heading back.

“I hope she’s ok,” Wayland said.

“I hope so too.” Erik replied.

They both managed to walk back in before the sun went down and the cold rolled in. Wayland spent the next week helping Erik forage. They never found much, and Erik was too weak to try and pull back his bow. On days where it was somewhat warm out they met up with the other survivors over winter. It looked like the town was down to maybe two or three hundred people. Lack of food, various illnesses, cold, suicides, and the occasional disappearance had reduced the town’s population down to maybe three hundred if you round up. 

Despite everything though, most people seemed a little optimistic. Despite the entire population being nearly starved to death and the survivors being battered beyond belief, having to survive seeing their friends and family falling over the winter. Everyone had the attitude that the worst was over. If they can just get to spring, they’ll have made it.

Wayland and Erik also visited Arya. It took a while for her to find a replacement camera but she did manage it. Though it was a while of replying through text. Arya never wanted to talk about the inside of the bunker and just wanted to talk about the outside. Both of them tried to downplay how sick Erik had been the past month, she didn’t seem to notice how many pounds they’d lost that winter. They did mention how rough things had been for the town recently and that’s why they couldn’t stop by. Arya understood and asked a bit about sicknesses in the town, if there were any other symptoms. Erik gave her firsthand experience without telling her it had been him.

Arya seems to complain endlessly about the bunker for a few weeks. They tried to help, but at a certain point Erik just had to say something.

“You know you can come out if you want.” Erik pointed out.

“... what?” Arya sputtered.

“Yea think about it,” Erik explained. “I mean other than being climate controlled and having electricity more often, it’s not fantastic from what you say.”

“There are still plagues out there!” Arya bleated. “And the dust makes it impossible to breathe. You guys have to forage for food constantly.”

“Yea but we have food we can actually find,” Wayland pointed out. “Sometimes we go hungry but we can still find food faster than you waiting on the hydroponics or the stores to give you a cup of plain rice.”

“Plus there are plagues in there too, you’ve told us people have been sick in there before.” Erik shot back.

“I… I did say that right,” Arya wondered.

“Look, we’re not asking you to give up your spot in there or anything,” Erik pointed out. “But at least think about it. I mean it’s not like you can be cooped up in there forever, you guys will need to come out eventually.” 

“... I need to go,” Arya replied while logging off.

On the walk back that day Wayland and Erik both wondered if what they said was the right thing to do. 

“Do you think we should have even suggested it to her? Wayland asked.

“I don’t know how else to help really,” Erik stated. “We’re still bringing her bits of food. And it’s not like they’re going to let us in to fix any of the issues.”

“Most of the issues are caused by too many people, too little infrastructure.” Wayland pointed out.

“Exactly, and I feel like at this point everyone in there has gone a bit paranoid about going outside.”

“Maybe we shouldn’t have told them how many people we’ve lost in the past year,” Wayland pointed out. “Heck after you nearly died I think everyone in there got a bit shifty about the plague.”

“Hmm,” Erik wondered. “Maybe you’re right, there’s still zero reason I couldn’t show them how to forage outside their bunker. They have the whole of the rocky mountains sitting on top of them, it could help them when the rice runs out.”

“Least Arya doesn’t look too bad, if she looked like either of us I don’t know what I’d do.”

“Yea…” Erik sighed.

“... still wondering if you should have given up the ticket?”

“... Yea.”

“You’re a better person than I am,” Wayland stated.

They walked in silence for a bit before Erik replied. 

“Dandelions and docks are starting to pop up a little south of here, let's see if we can get a backpack full.”

“Good plan.”

The next day they returned to the bunker and couldn’t get ahold of Arya.

“Think she’s ok?” Erik asked hitting the message button again on his phone

“Not sure,” Wayland stated.

“Think maybe she’s freaking out down there?” Erik wondered. ”Technical issues?”

“Maybe,” Wayland stated.

“...”

“We’re both thinking worse things aren’t we?” Erik hesitated.

“Yea I think so,” Wayland answered. “Either we annoyed her with the idea of coming outside…”

“Or?”

“Well it’s not like she’s the one with permission to open the door.”

“...”

“Yea, if that’s the case I don’t know what to do,” Wayland confessed.

Erik silently hit the resend button to send Arya another message.

“I hope I’m wrong,” Wayland reassured him.

“Yea, I hope so too.”



Link to Part 4/4


Saturday, July 16, 2022

List of Gadgets for Paranoia RPG. Over 100 so far! All of them are stupid in in some way.

1) Smert Gun: Stands for Synaptic Made Electronic Rife Test. Has a Stealth setting, a recon setting, a burst fire setting, a burst fire setting, a bayonet setting, and even an obfuscation setting.
Note: gun’s settings
On Stealth: It loudly announces it’s stealthing.
On Recon: It suggests that you throw it down the hallway and it’ll tell you what it sees.
On Burst Fire: Expends its entire magazine when it is switched into that mode. Note it fires it as soon as it’s in that mode, not whenever the trigger is pulled.
On Bayonet: it makes the entire gun sharp and hard to hold.
On Obfuscation: It asks cryptic questions and demands %*#@&*% 2) Laser Sword: Click the end and it will eject a stream of photons that form a bar. Another click and it turns off. Treat as Melee with other gm stipulations.
Note: The beam doesn’t stop until it runs into something. Usually a wall. 3) Force Field belt: Click the button on the front and a small forcefeild is produced with humming noises.
Note: nothing can get through the forcefield so it’s entirely black (no light) and entirely quiet (no sound) Note user may suffocate to death with time. 4) Toolbox: A rapid prototyping system that allows someone to build anything it can design and fit in the machine. Size 1ft by 1ft by 1ft.
Note: Things constructed this way will be somewhat too goddamn flimsy. And will have a sticker on the side that says made in china. 5) Heli Pack: A backpack with a massive propeller on the back of it. Turn on by losing the ripcord.
Note: Causes the person to rotate and/or vomit while operating it. 6) First Aid: A pack with a massive plus on the front. Instructions read press the button and step away to await healing.
Note: Releases a tiny robot that knocks out the user and covers the person covered in bandages. Your mileage may vary. 7) Tractor/Repeller beam: It has two settings towards and back. The max weight listed is 10 clones.
Note: Fires an equal yet opposite force on the user. 8) The LIGHT: Looks like a laser pistol,
Note: But instead of a laser diode tube. There is instead a LED bulb on the end. For use as a flashlight only. 9)Experimental Grenades: Roll 3d6. No freaking telling what they might do.
Note: Possible grenade types.
3-Improbability
4-Thermite
5-Poison
6-Tac nuke
7-Mutagenic
8-Warp vortex
9-Cluster
10- Smrt Bombs
11- Bunker Buster
12- Depression
13 -Paint
14-Sleep
15-Really COOL!!!
16-Fear
17- Cryogenic
18- History Eraser 10) Tesla Boots: At the push of a button will exclude a high mag field.
Note: No ability to turn off, force too strong to lift boot off metal. Shoelaces not included. 11) The Force Shield: Looks like an umbrella, but it’s a lot more scientific than that.
Note: Lets you shoot out of the umbrella, and can function as a parachute for the brave. 12) Reinforcement gun. A sniper rifle with an experimental personality matrix, it’s actually quite pleasant.
Note: Fires tiny I beams. Also the Gun gives compliments. If the user becomes depressed the gun may self-destruct. 13) JAM: Weird pinkish jam in a jar, can only be opened once.
Note: Unleashes a pink sludge that jams electronic equipment nearby.
Note: Sludge is rapidly self replicating and can rapidly flood a sector.
Note: Eats nearly all organic matter.
Note: Weakness to a mysterious substance known as peanut butter. 14) Al-Kea Catalog: Stands for Alpha- Kiosk of Easy Attributions. A catalog full of furnishing things that can be ordered for fairly cheap prices. There’s an insta delivery scanner taped to the side of it. Scan an item in the catalog to order it. Put the scanner on delivery mode to send it somewhere. Reloaded by putting money in the scanner.
Note: Material seems kinda shoddy and arrive only in their base components. 15) Myopia Focuser Gun: A high powered laser gun clad in thousands of buttons with a smart AI built in. Treat as an ordinary laser gun right up until a successful check by one is made. Gun appears to have a helpful and friendly AI installed with several hundred retractable focusing lenses installed.
Note: On hit the user experiences perfect 20/20 vision. 16) Dumbwaiter: A box roughly the size of a microwave, has the ability to make any kind of food provided it has the ingredients and the prep time.
Note: many of these ingredients are Treasonous. Has a list of things on the inside which are not allowed to be put inside Dumbwaiter. Internal AI sounds like jeeves. 17) Deployable tank: A light battle tank designed for instant use. Pull the tab and throw it where it needs to go. Tank is controlled by a less than friendly AI and it is advised not to get in it’s way.
Note: A massive water jug on treads. 18) Railgun: A large gun the size of a Toolshed with a laser sight attached. When fired, all the breakers flicker and immediately summons a construction crew to repair any damage.
Note: Gun summons a work crew to create rails, which lead to large rail mounted mortar. 19) Data Overload grenades: A set of grenades that will overload the target with sensory information. Synaptic Pressure Attack Mechanism.
Note: spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam, glorious spam, glorious spam. 20) Rapid Blueprinter: A printer that can rapidly produce a drawing of anything the user thinks about.
Note: The printer then sends this to the person in front of them. No matter how embarrassing. 21) Acoustic EXtreamE: A metal stick with a hollow body attached with several strings attached. Whenever the strings are distubered, a shrieking noise is heard out of any nearby speakers hooked up to Friend Computer.
Note: User may become deaf. 22) Transmogrifier: A cardboard box with several settings that looked like they were written by an infrared on too many pills. No idea what happens when you go through. Some of the settings include: Dupe! Beg? Merg& BEGGER!
Note: A tiger with a gun is forcing me to fill out the notes log. 23) Enemy Mine: A single use dart that can be fired at a living foe (no robots). Said foe now understands your viewpoint and the actions you’ve decided to make along the way and may see themselves in a new light. Maybe laserlight.
Note: Several Treasonous organizations have been uncovered with this. Mostly that of the person who fired it. 24) Debugger: A debugging tool found at the back of a supply closet, the folks at R&D added a handle and trigger mechanism.
Note: It’s an industrial strength flypaper dispenser. If the roll is bungled everyone gets covered in flypaper and it’s 2 successes to get out. 25) Invisibility Sign: It’s a hologram projector that makes you invisible. Took the folks at the psych department ten generations to figure out.
Note: It projects a holographic sign that says several pre-recorded messages such as, do you have any spare credits? 26) Cellphone: Will likely be given to the team leader. Allows you to communicate with the boys at R&D to offer on the go helpdesk support.
Note: It’s a piece of nanotech the size of human cells. Has to be injected. Note costs 1 xp per minute to talk. It also may allow spammers to communicate with you. 27) Icarus Pack: Will allow flight and to negate fall damage.
Note: Any amount of heat, like a lightbulb, will destroy and melt it. 28) Double stuffed Duplicator: 100 charges, will allow the user to create a copy of anyone the device scans. The size of a large backpack with a scanner attachment.
Note: Creates body pillows of those people scanned. 29) Junk drawer: Literally a drawer in the excess materials pile. Very small, maybe 10cm by 10cm by 10cm. Seems to enjoy eating junk and being messed with. Has something to do with chaos theory.
Note: Actually an intelligent and highly loyal robot. If worked on, will serve the person who created it. 30) RPG: A large explosive gun 3 charges. Can be fired with the explosives skill.
Note: Actually just fires books labeled shadowrun 9E at a non insignificant portion of the speed of light. Targetes explode into chunky salsa. Gun has a temporary cooldown while it tries to comprehend the amount of damage it did in terms of something called a d6. 31) The Exponential Acumulator Gun. Fires at a +1d6 after inputting credentials, required LAN connection to work.
Note: The EA gun fines you and spits out a receipt after firing every time. Min 1 credit per shot. Does not require extra laser barrels but once the server connection dies, it’s useless. 32) The Ally Signal: Summons an Ally to assist you.
Note: Grabs another one of your clones to appear. If there are no other clones, the weapon is destroyed. 33) Snip er Rifle: Disintegrates things it shoots at.
Note: Actually a snip er rifle, it disintegrates things it’s aimed at, and reintegrates them on the 2nd shot. 34) Hyginizer: Can fire various hygiene items though its slots to instantly clean a citizen of alpha complex.
Note: possible things fired.
1, A comb
2, 7 in 1 shampoo, conditioner, aftershave, cologne, mouthwash, energydrink, and grout cleaner
3, warm sudsy water
4, Soap, extra slippery
5, Minty Fresh toothpaste (green)
6, Razors 35) The Necessity Napsack: A bag with a learning AI built into it. Once someone reaches into the bag, the AI wishes to access the situation and instantly procure whatever the target needs.
Note: In reality it just provides towels of varying types and sizes. 36) Autofab an AI kit: A complex scanning gun that allows someone to instantly scan something and produce an Identical copy of an AI based on what’s been scanned. AI is ejected onto a port from a usb device.
Note: AI is either dumb, having a crisis, unhelpful, or something else of the type. Also they can’t do much other than talk when hooked up to their usb device and will need to be plugged into something else. 37) Dictator Bot: A small robot that when activated will proceed to start automatically bossing people around.
Note: In reality it will just start typingout things people say. 38) Presentiment Grenade: The most powerful and specialized smart bomb ever built. The size of a can of soda with a smart AI installed as well as seek and destroy features.
Note: In reality the bomb is capable of all of that and more. But it’s smart enough to not want to blow up and doesn’t want to die. Will try doing everything from asking for paperwork to having an existential crisis to stop from exploding. 39) Blowtorch: Point it at something to produce heat.
Note: It’s A flashlight with a fan attached. 40) Magnahammer: Allows for rapid construction through the use of magnetic fields. Granting rapid construction destruction fields.
Note: Has a high powered magnet inside. By flipping a switch up. Unable to be turned off without unscrewing the whole thing and taking the batteries out. 41) Dimensional Portal: A large projector system that allows for people to create portals to another dimension on them.
Note: Instantly paints a mirror on the wall/surface. It takes people longer than they’d care to admit to realize it’s a smart mirror that alters your perception slightly. 42) Instant Transportation Device: Instantly summons a method of transportation every time an XP coin is inserted.
Note: Somehow always inconvenient such as cabs get stolen or bakes have to be assembled. Or Tubes in the wrong direction. 43) MusicRightRay: A personal speaker that can automatically sense the appropriate music for the situation and play it.
Note: A lawyer will then show up and send a cease and desist letter or lawsuit. 44) Autotranslator: Point it at something, and it’s smart AI pattern. That will automatically make whatever it’s pointed at more readable/understandable.
Note: Translates everything into binary. 45) The No IR beam. A Lampish looking thing. When turned on it can cause security clearances to lower nearby.
Note: Causes something called the noir effect to happen where everything becomes black, white, and filled with stereotypical criminals and jazz music. Doubles as a speaker for said jazz music. The gangster voices may be a product of genetic memory. 46) The Psycho Pump: Auto injects self into bloodstream, will allow the user to receive a high level philosophy course within the span of one minute.
Note: It’s the Psychopomp function built into all clones. Once injected a countdown timer starts to the clone's auto death function. On the plus side the clone gets to hang out with the manifestation of death who only they can understand and talk to. The Psychopomp is incredibly wise and will do their best to help out the clone in what little time they have left, provided they think it will help the clone achieve inner peace. Expect clone death within 24 hours and some kind of a boost to the psychology skill.
47) InstaApproval: Instantly gives you the necessary approval to do whatever is needed. It is a small box with a button on the end.
Note: When the button is pressed anything from slowcalpping to applcause is heard as well as some possible confetti. No other effects other than people/AI thinking it has an effect. 48) The Time Machine: By Hacking reality itself this device allows you to fast forward or slow down time.
Note: In reality it actually just alters the local timepieces and reloaded time on synthetic systems. Robots may think time is passing/slowing down but that’s it. Note: the device may get jammed at the worst possible times. 49) The Concerning Camera: A camera with a friendly personality is able to hover in place but needs help to move. Loves taking pictures.
Note: Something always seems to ruin the pictures. Doesn’t matter what. 50) The lil slugger Smart Bat: A light up metal bat with a speaker inside that occasionally mentions a nice hit when using.
Note: If walking around with the bat, robots and other automated systems may start throwing things at the user. On failures to hit, it always seems to strike either the target or something similarly not good. Bat appears to be tapping into some kind of old based ball gram program. Not sure what’s based about it. 51) The Insta Car: Instantly downloads and 3dprints a Cherry Red Sports car. The guys at R&D are unsure what many of those words mean, but they’re happy to learn.
Note: Summons a car, Car has no gas, no insurance, and doesn’t find in 99% of the spaces in alpha complex. Note, may be quickly stolen or ticketed depending on where the device is located. There is no way to disassemble this car thing and the person who created it will be held responsible for it entirely. 52) Weather Control device: A localized weather control system that allows for someone to change the climate inside alpha complex
Note: Activates the fire suppression system and emergency tools. Included Co2 extinguishers, Vent Fans, Sprinkler system, and turning the lamps on high. Also has a tendency to short itself out when it rains. 53) Glycerin Type, Force Field generator. A revolutionary new type of forcefield system that’s shot out of a gun.
Note: Is a soap bubble gun. May get into people’s eyes. 54) The Insta ATM: A new method of banking on the go. If physical money is needed on vending machines, it will instantly turn XP into a credit type and dispense them at your feet.
Note: Uses a spin wheel(like old music players) to determine currency type. Notable things dispensed include; Dollary Doos, 5.56 bullets, bottlecaps, large pieces of engraved stone, tulips, zimbabwe trillion dollar bills, Meat. 55) The Bedazzler guN: Makes things look nice.
Note: Makes things it shoots at lazerproof for a short time, as well as easy to spot. 56) The spice rack: Found while cleaning out a kitchen. Was rebuilt to make it a crowd control device. Gun has 6 barrels.
Note: Barrels are.
1: Salt, it does damage to anyone wounded or is slimy.
2: Garlic, May repel mutants maybe?
3: Red pepper, Pepper sprays a local area, non lethal but people wish it wasn’t.
4 Cilantro, fires a layer of soapy goo onto surfaces.
5 Cinnamon, A surprising amount of people are allergic to it.
6 Peppercorns, Causes everyone to sneeze and may cause personal to be taken by medical. 57) The Button. When you press it, friend computer will arrive and ask if you can fill out some questionnaire for extra credits (xp).
Note: Typically asks questions involving the trolly problem, ethical dilemmas, paradoxes, things with no right answers, and said scenarios will be played out in real time. Roll a 1d6 x10 xp for whatever the amount of xp friend computer awards is. 58) Camerabea. An everything camera that can see into other dimensions parallel universes and invisible features.
Note: Just adds weird filters to stuff. 59) The N1N10 Doer V128. A highly advanced robotics controller system designed to be highly accessible and easy to use. Just strap it to your back and point the control interface at someone.
Note: The flash memory cartridges get built up with dust often and need to be cleaned. Also apparently the controller is designed for someone with 3 hands maybe. And don’t even think about trying to find compatible cartridges. 60) The Game Gauntlet: A noble tool of a more civilized age. Will summon friend computer down when the gauntlet’s holoprojector is thrown down. Upon doing so will allow a game to be played between opposing parties in order to settle arguments and the like.
Note: Nobody knows what the hell this game is or how to play it. A sticky note of the bottom says it runs “Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth-Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker” 61) The Memetic Device: A gun that when fired will allow for certain words or phrases to enter the target’s brain.
Note: Often backfires, often devolves into stupidity, Often spreads like a virus. 62) Elevator shoes: Pneumatically actuated shoes that allow for greater jumping.
Note: Most ceilings in alpha complet are pretty low 63) The collapsible sword: Sword made by some dude called Stanley. Seems to be fairly sharp.
Note: This is a tape measure. 64) GPS: The general positioning system. Type in what you want to find and it’ll point you in the right direction.
Note: AI seems to misunderstand what you want often. Also will only tell hot/cold directions. 65) The Assalt Weapon. Fires crowd control and less lethal ammo at people.
Note: Appears to fire a stream of salt. 66) The Smart Brick: A Device for disabling other devices. A rugged robot with a smart AI built in.
Note: A bludgeoning object, Says nokia on the side in faded letters. 67) The Staff Weapon. Pulled off some dude who looked like a furry and medieval cosplay, And friend computer doesn’t like hearing those words. Simple point and shoot interface.
Note: The thing gets jammed with blood often and is hard to turn off. Has 6 settings all of which are written in ancient egyptian.
1 Training, Fires light bolts that do nothing but hurt.
2 Taser, Zaps people who touch the tip.
3 Burst, Forest a constant burst of energy that doesn’t stop (this is hard to stop)
4 Intimidation, The staff menaces with power, doesn’t fire.
5 Single shot, standard fires one shot at a time.
6 Overload, to protect weapon from being taken by enemy, self destruct 68) The rope cannon. Fires rope at rapid speeds to subdue enemies, entangle foes and provide climbing tools.
Note: Looks suspiciously like several silly string canisters duct taped together. 69) The Amazon Primary. Will allow for instant delivery of whatever you require of the device.
Note: Upon ordering something expect a deluge of water to accompany your package. Will likely drown the user, cost them more than they thought it would, and the package may or may not arrive. 70) The Botcoin: A new type of currency used by robots. R&D Grabbed a few of them, to find out how they work.
Note: The coins are actually tiny robots that mobilize to do things. But they require a shitload of electricity to work. Also there’s a 85% chance some guy will talk your ear off about botcoin while trying to use it. These people are annoying and hard to get rid of. 71) Vaporwear: A software package that can do it all. Insert it onto any terminal and watch it do it’s magic.
Note: Pre alpha, all you can do is give more money to the kickstarter. Get ready for downloaded updates. When finished downloading the disk will turn to a puff of smoke for copyright infringement reasons. 72) The Metal Morph Armor: A set of advanced armor that will instantly offer not only protection. But will also allow the user to become another form such as car, beast, jet, ect. Highly advanced and provides 2 sets of armor when activated.
Note: User may be bent into usual shapes when using armor this way. Also armor tends to jam up and need oil often. No bathroom. 73) Volumix: Control sound completely!
Note: A tiny robot that screams, has a volume knob on the side. It can get loud. 74) Medical Database: Has 6 charges. Ask it a medical question and it will give you an answer in 10 minutes or less. Massive backpack that needs to be carried around.
Note: Summons an infrared clone and tests subject matter on them. Sends back a message that states whether or not this kills the infrared. 75) Car Keys: A set of car keys to a reddish golf cart sized vehicle that can fit 4. Can is sentient and can drive himself. Thinks it isn’t taken care of well.
Note: Car may have a light love of running people over. Wasn’t originally red. 76) Rogue.exe: A highly advanced piece of software designed to train the user in underhanded tactics.
Note: Is a USB drive that when inserted into anything it plays the original rogue game from 1984. Fun and slightly addictive. https://www.myabandonware.com/game/rogue-4n/play-4n
User may pick up strategies involving stab first, auto map locations, and other nefarious ideas. 77) The idea creator! A small metal box with a button and an antenna. Point and create an idea.
Note: Press the button once to turn on a small bare bulb lamp above the target. Hitting the button again on the 2nd target drops a mildly explosive lightbulb on the target. 78) The Carbonizer. A large pumped apparatus hooked up to several tanks. Looks like it’s meant to carbonize enemies.
Note: Full of liquid carbonite, turns people partically into stone. Q got this from the Mango’s ship. 79) The Grenade Bouquet: A large pouch of multicolored stylized grenades. No idea what they do. 12 grenades in a pouch.
Note: Looks suspiciously like an easter egg basket. Easter eggs are half full of candy and half full of useful junk. 80) The Disc Operator Blaster: A kitbashed monstrosity made out of old electronics and sonic entanglement devices. Probably a weapon.
Note: Fires High speed serrated cd’s out of the weapon, must be blasting obnoxious music out of the front to work “Default Disco”. On a misfire the tape deck gets jammed inside and needs to be rewound. 81) The Vendotronix: Appears to be a small stripped down vending machine. Note that this was built out of an older vending machine and as such many of the labels have fallen off. Device is reloaded by inserting 1xp chips.
Note: can also be loaded with a quarter on a string.
Items include:
1 Bubbly Fizz: Explodes when shaken.
2 Coolness Aid: Cans have the ability to fire through walls, comes in every color imaginable at random. Drinking it gives +1 to chutzpah checks. But probably stains the user's mouth some odd color. A faint “oh yea” can be heard from the gun when firing through walls.
3 Screwdriver: Highly flammable and alcoholic orange juice
4 Stuff Soup: Fires a blob of self replicating and mildly addictive soup. May or may not consume people from the inside.
5 Grog: Comes with a tiny animatronic pirate figure in every can. Worth mentioning the grog is highly corrosive and may eat through anything.
6 Hawaiian Punch: People will keel over in pain when hit and may be stunned. Also typically stains everything red. 82) The Complete Tool: Some kind of CD that when ran instantly “toolifies” anything it touches. Seems popular among people in construction.
Note: Plays tool music, may or may not make things who listen to said music more depressed/goth/emo/14 with prolonged exposure. 83) Evil Detector: A radar gun with a simple AI built into it. Detects whether or not someone is evil with little explanation.
Note: Detects whether someone has a goatee. 84) Bazookoid: Got from some cool cat. A large missile launcher with a sticker on the side that says only for mining. Has 3 settings, Boring, Destruct, Dismantle, Danger.
Boring: Begins firing tiny rockets to make a tunnel to somewhere nearby, note this can lead to somewhere with serious issues like a water pipe or killbots.
Destruct: Fires a standard missile.
Dismantle: Auto dismantles itself for 30day calibration and cleaning. Good luck putting it back together.
Danger: Sends out a large warning siren that the area is about to be destroyed and for all non hardhat wearing personnel to leave the area. 85) Statuesque Sentry Bot: A highly advanced AI construct with a prototype obfuscation matrix.
Note: This appears to be a garden gnome. Will get up/move around when it thinks nobody is watching. May screw with the troubleshoots in odd ways. 86) Personal Elevation device: Apparently elevator related issues have increased 400% in the past two weeks. The guys at R&D have designed a personal elevation device to ease any problems.
Note: Is a smart ladder with an extend function, seems to go on for a really really really long time. 87) Microwave cannon: Has the ability to make people's heads explode. An experimental antipersonnel cannon smells faintly of fish for some reason.
Note: While powerful every shot is required to put a new type of food item into the microwave magazine in order to reload the thing. Also takes slightly longer than you would like to finish exploding someone’s head. 88) The Memory Palace: A metal headband with a holographic projector, when the user places it on their head, shows memories of their choice through the holographic projector.
Note: Normally only shows memories that are embarrassing/irelivent/traitorous/ect. Maybe a person with a high ability to concentrate could learn more but it’s unlikely. 89) The Insurance Device: Has a number of settings each one designed to give new guarteas in the way you die. In the event that you or a loved one die in that manner, gain some XP. For the low low cost of 1xp for a membership. Insurance clauses include but are not limited to; lasers, elevators, organ inversion, slurry, killbots, vending machines, invaders, secret societies, and duck stuff.
Note: Actually guarantees you or a loved one will die that way. and provides up to date statistics on the probability that you'll (or a loved one) will die that way. 90) The escape pod: A rapid inflation/protection device designed to protect the user in the event of danger. Pull the tap to use! 91) The Red Clearance Danger Detector: Will automatically detect and mark dangerous objects /situations.
Note: It fires red flags at high speed. When firing it the gun will announce, warning a high speed object incoming, then plant a red flag in the target. 92) Lava Grenade: From sector GEO, a large metal and glass grenade full of a glowing substance. Grenade is hot to the touch.
Note: This is a lava lamp, full of dyed vegetable oils. Which may be lit on fire. 93) Internet Gun: Used to make network connections anywhere, fire it to create an internet connection.
Note: Fires a mess of Cat6 cables and zipties. Treat it as a netgun. Soon after firing, you’ll receive a call/visit from an IT personnel who’s here to figure out how to hook everything up. Expect a high bill and higher amount of time trying to organize the mess of personnel showing up at odd times. 94) The Insta Fortress: A fortress in a box, bull the tab and place on the ground to create a highly defensible perimeter.
Note: Out of the box a large amount of cardboard and duct tape will emerge accompanied by a cardboard robot who builds the fortress in one turn flat. Guardbot will then put up a “no girls allowed” sign and beat intruders with foam darts as well as a cardboard sword. Note: robot has the ability to scan people’s recorded gender for this. 95) The GG grenade: To be used on organic enemies only.
Causes a grey goo system to be released. Can only be stopped with hardcore Radiation or EMPs. 96) The Version 3 Grease Gun: A heavy industrial looking grease gun which is surprisingly effective at solving problems.
Note: This is an M3 submachine https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/M3_submachine_gun

97) Ol Stabby: A legacy micro killbot, no idea if it still works.
Note: This is a bowie knife superglued to an old roomba. It’s a lot smarter than it looks and when not being looked at has a tendency to get into shenanigans. 98) The Multivac: A large bulky complicated looking structure, Written on the side it states that it's used for studying the structure of false vacuums.
Note: A tiny supercomputer that is capable of answering any question. (note tiny means it’s still the size of a small fridge. Takes a while to answer questions and will often give the response, “insufficient data for meaningful answer”. Progressbar can be sped up by feeding it more info. Whatever that may be. 99) The animator: A classic raygun, point and shoot at something you wish would move.
Note: Causes a low budget, yet highly stylized version of whatever you want to be animated on friend computer’s servers and displayed in front of you. Has enough battery power for 6 episodes of something called ova. [Note, anime is treason.] 100) The Blendotronix: Has a label on the side of it that states it can destroy nearly everything that’s placed into it. Has a touchscreen interface.
Note: has the most archaic and unusual interface imaginable and may require a high operation roll to turn on. Who’d have thought that using a blender would be so complicated. 101) The AntiAntagonizer : A raygun with several dials that can be used to instantly nullify an area, making it safe for troubleshooters.
Note: Apparently the most common injuries in alpha complex involve sharp corners, falling on one’s but, and accidentally touching live power outlets. Upon firing will “baby proof” the area to the point where an area becomes much less dangerous. Instantly summons a construction bot to accomplish this. 102) The Micro Terror Deathray: Deathray, not sure what it kills though. Seems to be specifically tuned for something.
Note: Instantly destroys/disintegrates plastics and microplastics for whatever it’s aimed at. Quite a few things in alpha complex are made of plastic. 103) The Taser Version 8k: Most powerful taser yet built by Q. It menaces with spikes and flashing arcs of electricity. Might be non lethal? Or non non lethal? Require no recharge time!
Note: Just a big neon sign transformer hooked up to a trigger. Also has no room for batteries so the taser has to be plugged into a 240v mains plug to work. 104) The Insta Army!: A highly modernized and tactically advantageous robotic army system. Hit the button to activate the system.
Note: these are now all over alpha complex due to their unique plug and play system.
Note: These are basically robotic GI joe’s or toy soldiers with army gear. Each is at most 12 inches tall, weapons are small but functional. AIs are somewhat intelligent and do not understand they are toys.
Note: these are controlled by a simple remote control, and more Insta army packs can be found scattered all over the alpha complex. Packs include vehicles, other soldiers, weapons, villians, and some secretive holographic ones. 105) The Fossilizer: A grenade that when activated, will begin to rapidly fossilize the area around it.
Note: It’s a little transmitter that tells friend computer to start pouring cement in that area. Friend computer can pour a lot of cement. 106) Radar Senses: A headset that gives highly accurate display readings/measurements whenever you're looking at anything.
Note: They look suspiciously like cat ears and anyone who’s caught wearing them will be accused of being a furry. 107) The 1 C Type Cannon: Massive shoulder and backpack mounted cannon able to dispense pain all while looking good.
Note the Onesy Cannon, like a Tshirt cannon but able to replace an entire outfit. On a hit, Will also paste an outfit onto the onesie or jumpsuit the target was wearing if need be. Note, small chance these outfits will have features beyond the user’s clearance level. 108) The yellow clearance Gun: Much better than an ordinary orange clearance gun.
Note: This is just a banana.